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搞笑相声简短英语剧本

发布时间:2020-05-30   来源:剧本    点击:   
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  导语:说相声是非常有趣的,看相声总能够让我们开怀大笑,下面一起去欣赏小编为你分享的 搞笑相声简短英语剧本吧!

  搞笑相声简短英语剧本1

  A: "old X, I ask you to smile good or cry good?"

  B: "who doesn't know that laughing is better than crying!"

  A: "not really!"

  B: "why not?"

  A: "the most beautiful and exciting person in the world is the first cry of a born baby. (learn male, baby cry) 'wow, wow, wow. Whoa, whoa, whoa... '"

  B: "good, good, good, cry, cry better than smile!"

  A: "you don't take the heart against the heart, have you seen a newborn baby smile?"

  B: "no. Since the beginning of human beings, we have never heard of laughing from the belly of the mother. Crying is congenital, not learning; It takes learning and practice to laugh. If you come out of your life, you will laugh, and you will not confuse your parents and your parents!

  A: "you haven't seen it, haven't heard of it, don't have it. Do you ask the audience and the audience?"

  B: "everybody say have?"

  A: "look, that says yes."

  B: "you learn?"

  A: "wahaha, wahaha, breast-feeding?"

  B: "the child is a genius!"

  A: "wahaha, wahaha, safety is not safe? I want to eat mother's milk!"

  B: "does it still cry?"

  A: "look, those old people also shed tears!"

  B: "why?"

  A: "when people are old, they cry without tears.

  B: "that doesn't still smile!"

  A: "because laughing is better than crying."

  B: "you are two sides, which is good?"

  A: "laugh or cry, it is the outward expression of the feeling."

  B: "that's!"

  A: "there is an idiom that is crying and laughing. Sometimes I want to laugh but cry. I want to cry but laugh!

  B: "I don't believe it!"

  A: "don't believe me."

  B: "how?"

  A: "XXX was a wonderful performance in the cross talk show. The audience applauded and passed the judges' decision to win the title of the cross talk contest."

  B: "thank you, thank you, it's a dream come true! You know how hard it is! Thank my father, thank my mother, thank the leader, thank the audience, thank the media, thank the judges, thank... "

  A: "look, cry!"

  B: "is it crying? This is' tears of joy '!

  甲:“老X啊,我问你是笑好还是哭好?”

  乙:“谁不知道笑比哭好!”

  甲:“不见得!”

  乙:“怎么不见得?”

  甲:“世间最美妙、最激动人的是出生婴儿的第一声啼哭。(学男、女婴哭)‘哇、哇、哇;哇、哇、哇……’”

  乙:“好、好、好,哭吧、哭比笑好!”

  甲:“你别口服心不服,你见过刚出生的婴儿有笑的吗?”

  乙:“没有。自有人类以来,古今中外都没听说过刚从娘肚子出来就笑的。哭是先天性的,不用学;笑要靠后天学习、练习。如果一生出来就会笑,还不把爹娘和接生的吓晕!”

  甲:“你没见过、没听说过不见得就没有,你问问观众和听众有没有?”

  乙:“大家说有吗?”

  甲:“看,那位说有。”

  乙:“你学学?”

  甲:“哇哈哈、哇哈哈、要母乳喂养啊?”

  乙:“这孩子是天才呀!”

  甲:“哇哈哈、哇哈哈、安全不安全?我要吃妈妈的奶呀!”

  乙:“这不还是哭吗?”

  甲:“你看,那几位老人也流泪啦!”

  乙:“为什嘛?”

  甲:“人一上了年纪,哭无泪,笑才有泪。”

  乙:“那不还是笑嘛!”

  甲:“因为笑比哭好。”

  乙:“你是两面派,到底哪个好?”

  甲:“笑也好,哭也罢,都是感情的外在表现。”

  乙:“那是!”

  甲:“有个成语叫哭笑不得,有时本想笑却哭啦;本想哭却笑啦!”

  乙:“我不信!”

  甲:“不信咱试试。”

  乙:“怎么试?”

  甲:“xxx在这次相声表演中精彩绝伦,观众掌声雷动,经评委裁决,荣获相声大赛总冠军。”

  乙:“谢谢、谢谢、梦想成真啦!(抹眼泪)你知道多么多么的不容易呀!谢我爹、谢我娘、谢领导、谢观众、谢媒体、谢评委、谢……”

  甲:“看看,哭了吧!”

  乙:“这是哭吗?这是‘喜极而泣’!”

  搞笑相声简短英语剧本2

  A: can you answer my question in one word?

  B: can!!!!

  A: just, really, in a word. I ask you, are you going to the library today?

  B: would you like to go.

  A: are you reading?

  B: yes.

  A: don't you read the newspaper?

  B: no.

  A: why do you use two more words? You can answer: no.

  B: oh, "no" means no, no, no, it's funny!

  A: there are so many interesting words in Chinese characters! I ask you, what is the opposite of "positive"?

  B: not right.

  A: why do you answer with two more? You should answer "skew".

  B: I answered well, "no" and "positive" combined, not "crooked"?

  A: you're right. I ask you, what is the opposite of "good"?

  B: "bad", "no" and "good", ok?

  A: there is progress.

  B: you won't praise me, I'm far more ashamed than you!

  A: gee, I just wanted to ask you what the antonym of "want" is, and you said it yourself.

  B: what did I say?

  A: "don't"! "Don't" is a combination of "no" and "use". This is the meeting.

  B: I see, the words that we talked about are all meaning.

  A: you just know!

  甲:你能用一个字回答我的问话吗?

  乙:能!

  甲:干脆,真用一个字作答。我问你,你今天去图书室吗?

  乙:去。

  甲:是去看书吗?

  乙:是。

  甲:不是去看报吧?

  乙:不是。

  甲:怎么又用两个字作答啦?你可以这样回答:“否”。

  乙:噢,“口”说“不”为“否”,表示不是,真有趣!

  甲:汉字中像这样有趣的字还多呢!我问你,“正”的反义词是什么?

  乙:不正。

  甲:你怎么又用两个宇回答啦?你应回答“歪”。

  乙:我回答得也不错啊,“不”与“正”组合起来,不就是“歪”吗?

  甲:算你有理。我问你,“好”的反义词是什么?

  乙:“孬”,“不”与“好”组成的字,可以吧?

  甲:有长进。

  乙:你就“甭”夸我了,我比你还羞得远呢!

  甲:咦,我刚想问你,“要”的反义词是什么,你就自己说出来了。

  乙:我说什么啦?

  甲:“甭”呀!“甭”是“不”与“用”的合体字,表示不要。这是会意宇。

  乙:我明白了,原来我们谈的这些字都是会意宇呀!

  甲:你才知道啊!

本文来源:https://www.tjxdjx.cn/juben/99738/

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